"The Business of Being Born"

Are you wanting children but aren't too sure about where you want to have your baby?

Do you already have a child/ren that you had at the hospital and had a traumatic experience or didn't like how you were treated?

Have you ever considered having a midwife attend to your birth?

If you've answered "YES" to any of these questions, you SHOULD watch this film!

Right before I had my daughter, I started doing research on midwivery and what they offered as an alternative to having a hospital birth. I ended up having an OB/GYN (who was a super nice gal) and a hospital birth. Since my daughter was our first, there were a lot of things that we didn't know or didn't know what to expect when it came to labor and delivery. Since our OB was very sweet and my pregnancy was low risk, we went ahead and planned for a hospital birth.

First off, I'd like to say that I don't regret having our daughter in a hospital AT ALL! BUT...now having gone through the experience I wish my husband and I had more control over our own labor and delivery "agenda".

Things that I did that I don't plan on doing with our other children...

#1 - I went in to induce labor. The reason we chose this route, was for convienance. All of our family members live 5.5 hours away from us, so it was VERY nice to plan our birth for a weekend where everyone could be there to enjoy the experience and not being afraid of missing it. Knowing what I know now, and having more information, I will not volunteer for an induction. My labor could've gotten ugly, but it didn't thanks to my A-MAZING nurse that made my "bump in the road" possible to over come, I had a pretty flawless labor and delivery. Since I was given pitocin, I had a VERY hard time handling the contractions on my own that were causing AWFUL back labor, I got an epidural because I had to stay in bed when they gave me the pit. When that all happened, I got stuck at 4cm for about 3 hours, when it's ideal for you to gain 1cm an hour. Like I said, my nurse was amazing and did every "trick" in the book to get me over that hump and then I dilated to 10cm in a matter of over an HOUR! And what they didn't tell me was that a side effect of pitocin is excessive bleeding after the baby is born. I almost had to get pumped full of unnecessary drugs because I couldn't stop bleeding! Not to mention that because of the insanely intense labor, Miss K's breathing was erractic because she didn't adjust well the the intensity of the contractions. This all could've been avoided! Babies will come when they're dang good and ready too ;-)

*What upset me the most about getting the pitocin is, even though I was there for a scheduled induction, I went into active labor on my own and it was progressing quickly and there was no pressing need for them to give it to me to make labor go faster. The nurses still pushed the pitocin even though I didn't need it. My water even broke on it's own before I was given the pit. I was super happy being able to move around to get through the pain and do my own thing. What some of you may not know is that once they give you the pitocin, you are forever trapped on your bed because they have to monitor you and the baby every 15 minutes to see if you both are handling the intensity of the labor that is being brought on by the pitocin. If I didn't have to stay on my bed, I would've done it on my own and I probably wouldn't have gotten the epidural.

#2 - Cutting the umbilical cord almost instantly after Miss K was born. I've done LOTS of research on delayed cord clamping and I will SO be asking to have a delay on the clamping! I had no idea that my daughter missed out on A LOT of great nutrients by not getting to soak up every last little bit of the goodies from my placenta. Even though my daughter's cord was cut immediately after birth, she's totally fine by all means, but it would've been nice to let nature take it's course and do what it was meant to do.

#3 - An epidural. I will not be choosing to get an epidural for the rest of my births, for many reasons. The first reason being that it almost completely stalled my progress during my labor and if I had been stuck at 4cm for one more hour...the doctor would've pushed for a c-section...NO THANKS to major surgery! The second reason, the stinkin epidural that I got didn't even fully work, so I was mad because it was like there was almost no point when it didn't fully work! Sure, it took away about 98% of my pain, but I could still feel a lot in one of my legs because the needle/epi catheder was placed wrong so it only numbed one of my legs all the way. Thirdly, Miss K has such a tough time with breast feeding because she was so druged out.

In the beginning, I defended medicine when it came to having a baby. Because my OB/GYN was so nice and helpful, I swore that there was NO WAY she would push things because of her agenda and I thought there was NO WAY she wouldn't let me do what I wanted as far as managing my own pain and laboring how I wanted....boy oh boy was I wrong!

I didn't know that your doctor is basically only going to show up to catch your kid, then peace out! I love the idea that a midwife is there with you from the beginning of your pregnancy, until your baby is in your arms. For starters, my doctor broke her wrist a week before my induction and couldn't deliver me anyways so I had to get all "chummy" with a gal that I was meeting for the first time just hours before she was to assist in my birth! Thank goodness she was just as sweet and nice as my regular OB. I also really didn't like how rushed I felt to have my daughter when the process itself takes TIME to let your body do what it was meant to do and lots of it! The fact that they push pit, no matter what the situation is, is just upsetting. Now, I don't lay full blame of the rushing on the doctor's and nurses...the insurance companies make it IMPOSSIBLE for you to take longer than 24 hours to have a baby without charging you an arm and a leg for going over that "time limit"! For our insurance, it was, "you better have your baby within 24hrs and be out of the hospital in 48hrs" for a vaginal birth or "get you and that baby out of there in 72hrs" if you have a c-section. Insane, right?! At least I thought so! Anything over that time frame, you got slapped with a bill :-( Thankfully, (because we were rushed) we didn't have to pay a penny of our stay.

I get a little upset sometimes because the whole process was SO rushed, there were so many things that we didn't get to do or the pictures that we didn't get because it was all RUSH, RUSH, RUSH and BYE! My husband and I never got to take a picture with the 3 of us after Miss K was born in the hospital. We never got to take pictures of family members with us but were able to get all the pictures of our family members holding Miss K. I never got to see a Lacation Specialist like I wanted because by the time one was available we were already getting kicked out the door. Not to mention, we had the most PSYCHO post partum nurse that was just MEAN! How does someone like that have a job where love and affection isn't just necessary but NEEDED!

Getting to my point, if you haven't watching this movie, PLEASE DO IT! I had a love/hate relationpship with it. I was so furious the first 10 mintues into the movie because people are just clueless sometimes! Anymore, society believes we'll "fall apart" without modern medicine and that we won't be able to have babies safely without it. How in the hell do you think our ancestors got her...WITHOUT MEDICAL INTERVENTION and a lot of us turned out just fine!!! (Sorry for the language haha). This video sheds light on an option of child birth with a midwife instead of just feeling/thinking that your only choice is to have a hospital birth. Ricki Lake (love her more after watching this) had her first baby in a hospital, and like me, felt like she was cheated out of an experience that women were MEANT to do without intervention. Before she was even planning her 2nd baby she went out on a mission to learn everything there was to learn about midwives, home births, etc. She had her 2nd child in her home and she says she'll never have another baby in a hospital as long as it's in her control and everyone is healthy.

I want this experience that Ricki Lake had, more than EVER! Let me make one thing clear...I'm SO SO SO thankful for modern medicine! I'm thankful that I have a place that can take care of me and my child if something does compromise our health or well being! If I, for some reason, have a high risk pregnancy next time around, you betcha I'd strongly consider another hospital birth. I'm not saying that I would ever put myself or my unborn child in danger for the sake of having control over my own birth...no way would I ever do that! My ultimate goal will always remain, healthy mother, healthy baby, no matter how it happens!

There are many woman out there that just can't take the risk of having a home birth and a hospital is their only option...and that's okay! I will NEVER judge anyone who chooses to have a hospital birth over a home birth or a birth at a birthing center. It's all about what you're comfortable with and what you're willing to go through to get your little baby in your arms. Every single person is different :-)

For myself, and the next baby I have, I want a happy medium. I currently don't live in a place that feels like "home" to me, so I don't want to do a homebirth. BUT, I would LOVE the company of a midwive at a birthing center where it still has that "hospital" atmosphere, but you are in control of your birth and the midwives are there to assist you through the entire thing and no interventions are pushed on you. The cool thing about the birthing center is that they have ALL KINDS of supplies or options for you to help you get yourself through your birth, such as birthing tubs, birthing balls, and other equipment. There was SO much I didn't know about midwives and their practice. It's a common misunderstand that midwives are just these control freaks that aren't prepared if something goes wrong. On the contrary! Midwives carry almost the EXACT same supplies as OB's do in hospitals! If for some reason you were to bleed excessively after delivery, midwives have the drug that OB's would use to stop it. Midwives also have IV fluids on hand if they're needed, they have pitocin if it's necesarry to administer, etc. They don't just show up with nothing and expect you to get through it all if something were to go "wrong". The men and women are licensed professionals! My favorite saying "information is POWER".

All I want people to get from this post and by watching this video, is the information! YOU HAVE OPTIONS! :-) I would rather people make their decisions on knowing all their options and all the information, rather getting scared into doing something that they're not to excited about in the first place. A lot of soon to be parents aren't aware that they have a choice as to how they want to bring their baby into this world :-)

I would LOVE to hear from those of you that have watched this movie and share your thoughts, if you're willing :-) I would also love to hear about your birth stories.

I want this to be a place where people can vent or share their ideas so please be respectful to others!

Here are some links to help you find out more information about midwives and midwivery (Courtesty of Ina May Gaskin's website):

Links to Midwifery and Supportive Organizations

American College of Nurse-Midwives (ACNM)

818 Connecticut Avenue, NW, Suite 900
Washington, DC, 20006
United States
www.midwife.org
Phone: (888) MIDWIFE

MANA Midwives Alliance of North America

611 Pennsylvania Ave, SE #1700
Washington DC 20003-4303
www.mana.org
Phone:(888)-923-MANA (6262)

Birthworks

PO Box 2045
Medford, NJ, 08055
United States
www.hometown.aol.com/birthwkscd/bw.html
Phone: (888) TO-BIRTH

The Bradley Method of Natural Childbirth

Box 5224
Sherman Oaks, CA, 914135224
United States
www.bradleybirth.com
Phone: (800) 4-A-BIRTH

Citizens for Midwifery

PO Box 82227
Athens, GA, 306082227
United States
Cfmidwifery@yahoo.com
www.cfmidwifery.org
Phone: (888) CfM-4880

Doulas of North American (DONA)

1100 23rd Avenue East
Seattle, WA, 98112
United States
www.DONA.org
Phone: (801) 756 7331

Birth Arts International

51 Redemption Rock Trail N.
Princeton MA 01541
International
www.birtharts.org
Phone:(866)-303-4372

Association of Labor Assistants and Childbirth Educators

PO Box 382724
Cambridge, MA, 022382724
United States
Jessica Porter, Executive Director
www.alace.org
Phone: (888) 222 5223

Childbirth Enhancement Foundation

1004 George Ave.
Rockledge, FL, 32955
United States
www.cefcares.org
Phone: (321) 631 9977

Lamaze International

1200 19th Street, NW, Suite 300
Washington, DC, 200362422
United States
www.lamaze-childbirth.com
Phone: (202) 857 1128

International Childbirth Education Association, Inc. (ICEA)

P.O. Box 20048
Minneapolis, MN, 55420
United States
www.ICEA.org

Maternity Center Association

281 Park Avenue South, 5th Floor
New York, NY, 10010
United States
www.maternity.org
Phone: (212) 777 5000

National Association of Childbearing Centers (NACC)

(Write and enclose $1.00 for guidelines and brochure.)
3123 Gottschall Road
Perkiomenville, PA, 18074-954
United States
www.BirthCenters.org

Postpartum Support International

927 North Kellogg Avenue
Santa Barbara, CA, United States
www.postpartum.net
Phone: (805) 967 7636

National Association of Postpartum Care Services (NAPCS)

800 Detroit St.
Denver, CO, 80206
United States
www.napcs.org
Phone: (800) 45-DOULA

International Cesarean Awareness Network (ICAN)

1304 Kingsdale Avenue
Redondo Beach, CA, 90278
United States
http://www.childbirth.org/section/ICAN.html
Phone: (310) 542 5368

La Leche League

1400 North Meacham Road
Schaumberg, IL, 60173-404
United States
www.lalecheleague.org
Phone: (800) LALECHE

Midwifery Today

PO Box 2672
Eugene, OR, 97402
United States
Midwifery@aol.com
www.midwiferytoday.com
Phone: (800) 743 0974

Birth Matters

We envision pregnant women embraced by their communities, encouraged to trust the journey, discovering their strength and the transformational power of birth.
Warrenton, VA, 20188
United States
Melaine Copeland
melainecopeland@hotmail.com
http://www.birthmattersva.org