Baby E's Birth Story

 

SHE is here!!! Meet Baby E :-)

8lbs 3oz of perfection!

DO NOT COPY - All Rights Reserved

Baby E decided to make her appearance on Oct 13th (so don't mind that I'm just NOW getting to post her birth story almost two months later haha)

At little background info...with Miss K, we had a hospital induced birth just two days past my due date. It was awful as far as it not being what we thought, but it definitely wasn't the experience we pictured (we didn't have an unrealistic expectation either) but we knew that when Miss K's birth was done, that we wanted a different experience the next time around. We did our research and realized that we really wanted to give a natural, unmedicated, out of hospital birth a shot if everything went well with my pregnancy.

Shortly after we moved back to our hometown, I started heavily researching midwives and free standing birth centers in the area. We came across Around the Circle Midwifery and their Birth House. We heard nothing but amazing things about this place, so we set up a meeting with them once we found out I was pregnant with baby #2. We were paired up with our wonderful midwife Christy and her assistant Jenny, who was actually a licensed midwife in Texas but after they moved to WA she's been having issues getting licensed here so she has to act as an assistant instead. They were newly hired to ATC just before we called to set up our appointment.

In Washington State, you can legally give birth in a free standing birth house from 37-42 weeks. When I hit 40 weeks, I'm not sure why, but I was starting to get nervous about hitting 42 weeks. I would have been OKAY if I ended up having to have a hospital birth at 42 weeks but I so desperately wanted my natural birth experience. At my 40 week appointment (where I was actually 40 weeks and 3 days), I was hoping for a great report because the entire week leading up to that appointment I was having LOTS of Braxton Hicks contractions. I'll admit I was extremely bummed when Christy said I was only 3cm which is what I was the week before. UGH. So, three days later a day before I was 41 weeks, I had a total meltdown (damn hormones) about how I was so not wanting to hit 42 weeks, etc.

Well, I am convinced that I just needed to vent and have that meltdown because the very next morning at 5:45am I was awakened by some very nice contractions that immediately started at 5-7 mins apart. Christy told us that we didn't need to call her until the contractions were consistent and lasted at least two hours. We waited, they lasted two hours, we called her. She told me I could labor at home for as long as I wanted and just to shoot her a call when I felt I needed to come in or if I was having a hard time coping with my contractions on my own.

I wanted to make sure that I did everything I could to keep labor progressing so Derek and I put some warm clothes on and went for a walk down our driveway. I got halfway down our mile long driveway before I finally wanted to turn back. I wanted to go back to sleep lol! Labor lasted all morning, contractions stayed consistently at 5-7 minutes apart but continued to get more intense at the same time. I was actually incredibly surprised that the contractions were "easy" to get through and manage. I was pretty nervous about how I would do when the time came and if I could handle them. I also found it interesting how some pain management techniques would work at different points in my labor. For example, in the beginning, it felt amazing to have Derek put pressure on my spine right between my hips, but at about half way through labor, it didn't feel good at all. Every once in a while I would lay down on my side, get up and walk around the house/outside or I would stand by our couch and rest against it while I squatted during contractions, it was pretty cool to just experience labor and listen to what my body was telling me.

Around 12:30pm I was starting to realize that we still had a 35-40 minute drive ahead of us to get to the birth center and the idea of being strapped down in a car not being able to move around was starting to go through my mind. It also made me realize that I wasn't quite sure when I should make the call to head in. I called Christy at that point and picked her brain, she asked me questions, listened while I went through a couple contractions to see how I handled them and then suggested that we meet her at the Birth House at 2pm. That really got me excited! Between that phone call and getting in the truck to head out, my labor changed, became a little more intense, which was probably the most entertaining thing for anyone that passed us on the freeway and saw my facial expressions. I'm sure I looked like I was about to tear in half because sitting in that damn seat with my seat belt on, not getting to do ANYTHING to help with the contractions, SUCKED. Period. Flat. out. sucked! I had about 5-6 contractions on the way there which wasn't TOO bad, but still, I would have had like about ZERO. haha!

We arrived at the Birth House, they brought me into the exam room to check my vitals, see how I was feeling, how the baby was doing and then wanted to check my progress. I asked them not to tell me how dilated I was because I didn't want to get wrapped up in numbers. I knew I was in active labor, it was progressing at a GREAT pace, so why find out how dilated I was?! One thing I kind of found hilarious was how Christy had to really contort her body in different ways to work with me as I moved around how I needed to get through contractions to listen to the baby as I went through them hahaha! At this point, Christy and Jenny officially "welcomed" us to being officially checked into the BH. I thought that was adorable because we all had like a mini celebration/dance party.

Once we were done celebrating all that awesomeness, Jenny told me to walk to the local grocery store about 4-5 blocks away to go get something to eat and keep things moving along. Before we left, the funniest thing that came out of Jenny's mouth was "don't let anyone call an ambulance on you, we've had that happen before!" ;-) With that thought in mind, as I walked out the door, I won't lie, I was a little self conscious about how people would see me when I went through contractions. When I would deal with contractions, I would hold onto Derek and do this low (sometimes loud) moaning growl while squatting really low to the ground and sway at the same time. On the way there, one car actually pulled over to us and was asking if we were okay. We also had my dearest friend Aimee there so she helped move people along as they showed concern. It was sweet and way hilarious. So, I had a couple good contractions on the way to the store and when we got there, I almost didn't want to go in, because it was an enclosed building, and I wasn't a quiet person during this process by any means. I pushed myself in there, started searching for food and a contraction comes along....surprisingly, not even one person batted an eye. This made sense because I'm not the first laboring mother from ATC that has been sent her during labor so I'm sure that they were all way used to it. I had one more contraction before leaving the store and as I waited outside for Derek to pay for our lunch, I had a few really good contractions super close together and I was ready to get back to the BH. During this time, Aimee was letting my parents know that if they wanted to go out and about for a while, they had time to do so, so they left for Costco.

We arrived back at the BH and started eating lunch. I got two bits into my pasta salad and BOOM! All I remember at that point was that I got on the floor on my hands and knees and had three SUPER intense contractions stacked right on top of each other. *Little did I know, Aimee was asking Derek for my Mom's cell number to get them back ASAP because she knew that "this was happening BIG TIME"* My midwives heard me from the back of the BH and walked into the waiting area to see how I was doing. They encouraged us to start heading back to our birth suite to get settled. During one of my prenatal visits I remember talking about how I wanted to try to labor in the tub as much as possible and that they really try to make sure you don't get in too early so that when you really want it to work for you it does, because if you get in too early, it might not be as effective. When I walked into my room, they immediately asked me if I wanted to get in the tub, I was totally stunned thinking that there was no way I was close enough to get in. I didn't feel like it was that "bad" at that point to be getting in but I went with the flow because I trusted them.

Ladies, let me tell you, that tub, was. HEAVEN. It didn't take the pain away from the contractions a whole lot, but it took the edge off for sure and almost shifted them. If that makes any sense. It was the fact that gravity was taken out of the equation. I had insane back labor with Miss K  and this baby so it was amazing to not have the contractions centralized there. When I first got in, I wanted the tub to myself with Derek tub side. He made sure I stayed hydrated and fed me some pasta salad every once in a while, he was amazing. At some point my midwives had me step out of the tub and labor in the bathroom while they drained and refilled the tub so it continued to have a good effect on my labor. I did NOT want to get out! When I got out, that's when I realized how effective the tub was helping with my labor. They basically just wanted to have me try different things to see what I really liked and the tub was it. I appreciated that they were having me do different things because I've never had a natural child birth and looked to them for guidance on pain management, so it was great.

Once I got back in the tub, my labor because super intense and I knew I wanted Derek to get in with me. He got in the tub and sat behind me. It was absolutely crazy how soothing it was to have Derek behind me holding me. It helped me relax on a whole other level that I didn't think I could reach, not that I wasn't doing okay, but anything else that helped was a bonus. I could also tell it was a big deal for him too because I felt through his energy that he was finally happy to be holding me and comfort me during the process since partners really can't relate to what you're going through and I'm sure most of them feel helpless through the process. For the first part of being back in the tub, being on my hands and knees just felt better to me, because the idea of being on my back was not so great lol. Then out of no where, my labor turned BIG TIME. It was almost like a switch was flipped. My movements changed, the noises I was making changed drastically and I could tell by every one's faces in the room that "this was it" our baby was coming at that moment.

I seriously can't say enough how cool and crazy it was to just witness my body doing it's own thing. I honestly had NO control over what was happening and not ONCE did I ever have to push. My body literally pushed our baby out on it's own. It was SO cool! I wish I could explain better, but it's hard to do so. When she started to crown, I had a tiny moment where I lost a little control because I felt that I was going to (*Warning - possible TMI) tear UP instead of tear DOWN....OUCH....so I started panicking a little saying "I'm tearing up, I'm tearing up, not down!" and right then, they had me flip over to my back (which I was nervous about but thankfully for being in the tub, I just floated and it was amazing) and Derek snuggled me right up, it was perfect. Flipping over helped a little but I still felt like I was going to tear up, just not as badly.

It all happened SO fast to me. Next, I remember Jenny having to yell in my ear (because it was SO hard to hear or focus on anyone at that point) telling me how to breath, then Christy and Jenny were asking me to see if I wanted to look down at Evie or if I wanted a mirror to see her but I honestly couldn't bend forward because it made contractions more intense for me and I was getting uncomfy so I decided not to, but I did feel her coming out which was perfect for me. It was SO freakin cool! Then, BAM, Evie came RIGHT out all in one motion, Christy put her on my chest and I immediately started BALLING. I. HAD. DONE. IT! I just birthed this perfect little person, out of a hospital, with no drugs. It was a couple minutes before I even checked to see if baby was a boy or a girl. When things settled just a little, Christy ask Derek if he wanted to see if we had a little girl or boy and I looked up, saw my mom balling and she started yelling "WE HAVE AN EVIE, WE HAVE AN EVIE", it was another perfect moment.

There were SO many reasons why we chose this route for out birth this time around. Miss K's birth wasn't HORRIBLE, in fact, it was about the "best" as it could be for being a scheduled induction, but we felt so disappointed on so many levels. We were promised so much and were totally let down. The thing that bothered me the most was that my OBGYNs talked up husband involvement during birth only to find out that 98% of the time they basically pushed him out of the way. We felt out of the loop the entire time which really played a huge role into how scared we were about things happening. We were never informed about anything unless we asked a ton of questions to pry out information. We had a very sweet labor and delivery team at the hospital, but we just felt so uncomfortable the entire time. Then, because I had a pitocin induced birth, Miss K came out with erratic breathing and they had to take her away from me SECONDS after her coming out and I almost hemorrhaged :-( All were side effects of getting pitocin. We mostly felt like objects, not people and that everyone was so eager to get the whole thing done, it was hard to enjoy the experience, which really upset us because we were having our first baby! It was a BIG deal! Another reason we chose the Birth House was for breastfeeding benefits and a more relaxing/laid back experience. Unmedicated babies tend to have more success. The recovery process was another big one. And lastly, I thought I was fine with the idea of an epidural, but when I got it with Miss K, it REALLY bothered me that I couldn't feel what was happening.

Don't get me wrong....I'm EXTREMELY happy that we have such advanced medicine for when it's absolutely necessary to need it. I'm just not a fan of modern medicine when it's not needed but pushed. I'm a FIRM believer that childbirth is a very natural process that does not need medical intervention if there isn't anything wrong and that a woman has a very healthy pregnancy. OF COURSE, I'm not stubborn to the point where I would refuse medical intervention if it was absolutely necessary...period :-) But why seek it before you need it? ;-)

In all the books I read to prepare us for this experience, every single one of the stories that I read, women said that it was the most empowering experience of their lives. And it was. It was SO incredible to just witness how powerful a woman's body is when it's left alone during childbirth. What was more amazing was how graceful, beautiful, and CALM the whole entire process was even though I'm sure that the people attending my birth might not always have thought so because of what I did that felt best to get through it....let's just say I sounded like a grizzly bear most of the time ;-)

I know that no matter what, I could have done this every time, but what made it so amazing was my birth team. I think it is SO important to surround yourself with people that you are okay with seeing you at your most vulnerable, because you WILL be super vulnuerable and if you feel uncomforable or anxious at all, it WILL affect you and your labor. The mind is very powerful ;-)

My birth team consisted of:

Our wonderful midwives Christy and Jenny at Around the Circle Midwifery. These ladies were "the bomb"! The care and attention that we received was spectacular. They end up becoming very dear friends during the process. They always answered our questions/concerns and went above and beyond to make sure that we were completely comfortable and confident. I can't thank these women enough!

My absolute wonderful and closest friend Aimee - She was our rock. There is nothing I can do or say that can TRULY express my thankfulness and gratitude toward this women, but I'm going to try to do so for the rest of our lives! After having two home births herself, she was my go to gal! Not only was she my go to gal because of her experience with births, but she was just another amazing sole that truly appreciated the miracle of the whole process to its core like I did. She had been with me since the day I got to tell her we were trying to have another baby, to the day that stick said positive, to the moment E was born. She showed up with us at the BH and helped me cope with labor and was just the most amazing advocate for Derek and I. Her presence was so comforting. She really took the time to help put our families at ease (we were the first ones to have an out of hospital birth on either side of the family) and it really made the experience that much more enjoyable for everyone. Once Derek and I got into a great rhythm, she stepped back and took the most STUNNING photographs of us (which are the ones you are seeing in this post). The first image I shared, I will always teasure that photo and what it means to me. That first image, was the empitomy of our birth experience wrapped in that single photo. I cry everytime I look at it to this day!

My Mama - Even though our original plan was not to have family in the room with us like we had it for K's birth, but I'm SO thankful that it worked out that way that it did and that she was in there with us. There was something incredible about having my mom in there and being able to have her there to witness that beautiful experience that I didn't think I needed or didn't realize I missed out on with Miss K's birth. She was a little hesitant about the idea of an out of hospital birth, but to see what that experience did to her persepective once it was done, was PRICELESS! What I really love, since it was a bit difficult for me to look to see E coming out and that Derek was behind me so he really couldn't see, was that my Mom was there and had a front row seat to E's birth. I'm super thankful of that because seeing the look on her face when it happened will be another moment that I deeply cherish for the rest of my life. You can't fake that kind of excitement or emotion.

Derek - Lordy, I could write another novel about this man. His touch made everything less intense and calmed me, the energy and love he was emitting the entire time was incredible and whether he knows it or not, did SO much for me. To finally get that birthing experience that we always hoped for together was unbelievable. If it was even possible, I love him even more. The coolest part, when things finally slowed down and we were able to share our thoughts about the experience, he told me that he almost felt like he could feel what I was going through. Like when I went through a contraction, he could feel my pain and it gave him a better sense of what he needed to do to help comfort me I guess, if that makes sense. I know that's a little corny sounding but it's true. I actually read in one of Ina May's books that a lot of husbands would say that when the couple became "one" with their energies. PRETTY. STINKIN. AMAZING stuff! I love you so much Derek and I really look forward to more experiences like this with you!

If there is anything I want you (as women) to take away from this, it's that, YOU HAVE A CHOICE to have your perfect birth. You have OPTIONS and you CAN do it! If you're thinking about starting a family or adding to your family or even if you're pregnant while reading this, it's NEVER too late to look at your options and pick what's best for you and your new little family. Everyone is different, some may feel better about hospital births, others may want a birth center like we did and then there are those that feel home births are the best choice. No matter how you bring a baby into this world, FEEL CONFIDENT about the choices you make. NEVER make decisions based on everyone else's opinion or emotions, NEVER make decisions based on misinformation. RESEARCH! :-) Information is POWER. Scared or curious about certain things, for example, are you curious about having an out of hospital birth but don't know where to start, ASK SOMEONE :-) Unfortunately, more often than not, you'll hear horror stories before hearing success stories...just remember that ;-) There are LOTS of great birth stories out there to be told :-)

If there is absolutely anything you would love to know that I didn't mention or talk about in this post about E's birth, PLEASE ask. I LOVE talking about it and could honestly talk about this stuff all day long! ;-)

Thank you all so much for reading about our experience and I really hope someone can gain something from it because there need to be more amazing birth stories out there like this one :-)


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UPDATE

I've been asked a lot of questions that I figured I would add to this post in case some of you have the same ones ;-)
 - At any point, did I want pain medication?

No. Not one second of the whole process did I feel like I needed pain medication or interventions. I will tell you right now, it is 95% MENTAL and only 5% PHYSICAL. Your body knows EXACTLY what to do during childbirth (there are some that need a little help, but mostly, the body knows).

- What did you do to prepare yourself for your birth?

I read A LOT of books! We didn't have the opportunity to take child birth classes due to Derek's work schedule, so I read and read and read. Here is a list of the books I read...

Ina May's Guide to Childbirth - Ina May Gaskin
*this book is A-MAZING and I HIGHLY recommend it.
Spritual Midwifery - Ina May Gaskin
Birthing from Within -

Additional books that I had but didn't get to that were suggested to me....

Hypnobirthing -

- Did it hurt?

Let me put it this way....is surely doesn't TICKLE lol! ;-) But, the key is to not focus on the pain. The key is to NOT anticipate contractions. Let a contraction come, deal with it how you feel is most comfortable and then RELAX once it's over. That's it. To be super honest, once Miss E was out, I already forgot what the pain was like just seconds after she was born. Another VERY VERY important thing is to remember that the pain isn't going to kill you. It's your body and mind's natural response to want to "run away from" or do what you need to get rid of the pain, but that isn't going to happen until baby is out, so just stay relaxed and let it happen. That seriously made a huge difference in how I approached my labor. I also did A LOT of different things to see what worked best for me when it came to managing the pain. I would squat, sway back and forth, have Derek or Aimee apply pressure to my spine between my hips, lay on my side, get on my hands and knees....you get the idea ;-)

- Did you stay at the Birth House overnight?

No. Washington State laws require that you be discharged from a free standing birth center within 5 hours after having your baby. We were actually discharged 3 hours after E was born and it was SO nice to be able to go home and be in our own bed and where we were most comfortable.

- Did the idea of having to go home so soon after birth freak us out?

Yes, it did a little at first but your midwives should equip you will all the info you need to know, to make the transition at home for the first 48 hours smoothly. We also had a 24 hour appointment, then a 3-5 day follow up with our midwife so it's not like once you leave, you're on your own. They really monitor you and make sure things are okay. It was a little unnerving that we were responsible for me and the baby so quickly after birth since when we had Miss K at a hospital, they did all the checking and fixing and monitoring but it wasn't bad at all. I actually appreciated that we were encouraged to pay more attention to my body and our newborn.

- Did it feel like your labor took forever?

My labor with K was 14 hours. I was always told that "typically" each child you have after the first, the labors are shorter. Well, E's labor WAS shorter, but it was still 12 hours from when I was awakened by contractions to when she was born. However, when I was in really active labor, that part was way shorter and she came out much faster than K did. I pushed 45 mins with K. In all honesty, once I was in really active labor, I had no concept of time what so ever. In fact, I felt like it all happened so much faster than it actually did. It seemed like we were only at the BH for an hour before she was born, rather than 3 hours.

*WARNING - this one is a little much info, but I seriously keep getting asked, so I'm answering*

- Did you pee and poop in the tub during labor?

Yep. It's GOING to happen. Did we ever once think about it or were we ever bothered by it...not at all. When you're in active labor, that last thing you're going to think about is if you excrete into the tub. Plus, my midwives were super awesome about keeping the water clean if something did happen because I NEVER noticed it. I was able to eat and drink during my entire labor so of course it's going to happen ;-) And no, it didn't bother Derek either because he was so focused on what he was doing for me. You seriously don't notice it, and WHO CARES?! LOL! :-)

- Would you do this all over again? Would you change anything?

I would do this again in a freakin heartbeat! Actually, we are looking to have a home birth next time, if where we are at a point in our lives where we can, when we think about having another. I wouldn't change a single thing about our experience....not ONE thing. I'll forever look back on this day and think how truly incredible it was. It was perfection. It was absolutely miraculous and beautiful. Here are a few more photos from our birth....MUCH more to come ;-)

DO NOT COPY - All Rights Reserved

DO NOT COPY - All Rights Reserved

DO NOT COPY - All Rights Reserved