There are MANY different opinions as to what attachment parenting is but it's basically meeting your babies needs in some of the most natural ways possible and following your parenting instincts. Some things may include: NOT letting your baby cry it out, baby wearing (wearing your baby in a wrap or sling as much as possible), feeding on demand, safe co-sleeping, bed sharing, natural birth, using cloth diapers, extended breastfeeding, no circumcising, no vaccinations, etc. That is just a taste of what can define attachment/natural parenting. Here are a couple sites that explain attachment parenting or are sites entirely based on attachment parenting.
KellyMom.com
Attachment Parenting International
What is Attachment Parenting?
Attachment Parenting
Now, I don't practice all of the things that I listed above and you don't have to to be an attachment parent. I vaccinate, I didn't get to do extended breastfeeding because I stopped when Kaelyn went through her scare but I would have breastfed her until she was 2 years old, I had Kaelyn in a hospital and had an epidural, we bed share, etc.
I found this comic that basically paints the perfect picture of the criticism attachment parents face everyday...
Excessive Crying Harmful to Babies
Dangers of Leaving Baby to Cry It Out
'Babywise' Linked to Babies' Dehydration and Failure to Thrive
There are MANY more articles on those pages that you can look at but these three are to get you started.
There is a huge difference in letting your baby "cry it out" and putting your baby down for a few minutes to collect yourself and your sanity so you don't end up doing something drastic to yourself or the baby. I had to do this a couple times when I was exhausted and nothing I did for Kaelyn would sooth her!
I do want you all to know that I understand that my parenting style doesn't work for everyone and that I completely respect EVERYONE'S method of parenting because that's what they chose to work best for their family. Attachment parenting just ended up working best for ours and we love it! :-)
Caty, I wish that I would have done as much research as you when Jaekub was a newborn. I got sucked into a lot of the stuff that doctors and books tell you now, like not to feed too often, to have them cry it out, no sleeping together, etc... I did start doing some of the stuff that you do though. After trying the "cry it out" method for two nights, I quit. I also was not okay with listening to him cry, so a lot of times he snuggled with us for a large portion of the night. He now sleeps in his own bed and goes to sleep without crying, but he did that on his own time. I respect what you are doing! Only you know how to be a mom to your baby :)
ReplyDeleteAww thank you Kassandra! I honestly believe that every person knows what's best for their family and I don't get why people can't understand that themselves! I may not like some things that people do with their kids...but I'm not about to judge them for it or tell them that what they are doing is wrong...because that's what they chose to work for them and their family!
ReplyDeleteI'll be honest...I got lucky...I have a really good friend back in Shelton that did SO much research when she had her son and she's been passing everything she knows off to me! She's been such an amazing help and I'm able to do things with knowledge! WOOT WOOT!
At least you will know with baby number 2!! Gotta be excited about that!
Love you girl!
Caty, thanks for posting this! We are attached parents too! I don't do all the things that some attached parents do but I do most of them...I definately do not let Elijah "cry it out" I can't stand to let him cry especially because I know as soon as I pick him up he will stop crying. I did read the babywise book and most of the stuff in that book I totally disagree with, but it did help me better understand his hunger cues. When he was brand new I thought he was always hungry and would be feeding him every 1 hour or 1.5 hours but I learned that when he is tired sometimes he acts like he wants to nurse but when I would nurse him he would just get mad. That is the only thing that helped me from that book and I think I would have eventually figured it out on my own lol. We co sleep, babywear, demand feed, cloth diapers, nat. birth but with epidural that didn't work and I plan to breastfeed till he is 18-24 months...It is kinda funny becuase I never heard of attached parenting until you shared sausage mama on fb with me but it just so happened that I was already an attached parent lol i just didn't know it! :)
ReplyDeleteAWWW I'm so glad you liked this post Mandy! I just had to do it because like you said, didn't know it had a label and I also wanted to do it to let people know that it's OKAY to be an attached parent! How the hell does everyone think people parented before mainstream and media! Cavemen were the epitomy of attachment parents! lol!
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